suffering from a distressing case of LDR

first off .. kudos to all those poor retards who have had the misfortune to experience and more so to those who have actually survived the wonderous wonders of "long distance relationships"
... suddenly the terms:
unbearable
aching heart
gaping hole
excruciating
to long for
heartbreaking
pining
dull pain
pangs
agonizing
heartwrenching
and ofcourse
chinese torture
have taken on a new more real meaning .... and the best part ... im pretty much doing this to myself not because im a fucking sado-masochist (which im sure i am on some level or the other) but well you gotta do what you gotta do ..even if it fucking well kills you (which this is.. slow slow slowly) urghhhhhhhh surprise surprise even screaming your heart out into a pillow does not make this any easier!! so0o yea secondly to all of you who were stupid enough to put yourself in the position how the fuck did you do it?!!? and why is it that all of a sudden when some one says "yea i can imagine long dist must be quite difficult" you smile sadly and nod (like you do when talking about some tragic event or the other) all the while wanting to tear off their silly little head and say "No you fucking retard you cant imagine! it isnt just difficult its fucking torture and consider yourself lucky you havnt a clue about it!!!!"
*phew.... good to get that off my chest! but then again maybe thats just me!! yeaaa ive been a little distraught lately ... hah and whats brilliant is that this really isnt anything ... which just makes me think what the fuck will happen to me if im faced with actual shit ...

Sheriff's deputy Andy McDowell was forced to live a parent's worst
nightmare twice in a matter of minutes After he was taken to
the site where one of his two sons was killed in a car crash early
Wednesday, McDowell was driven past another fatal accident. Only later did
he learn that the fiery wreck took the life of his only other child.

fuck. :(